A little over a year ago at work, we started realizing the advertising agency we hired couldn't do the level of work we needed. We started discussing firing them. This little spark led to the fire that caused the last year to be insane. Insane! Meetings after meetings to discuss firing our agency, hiring consultants and embarking on a national search to find a new agency. This was big. I *thought* it would be fun to be on the other side. The client side. They don't have to work weekends and late nights getting creative ready. It will be easy. I was so wrong.
February and March meetings led to meeting with consultants in April. All day long meetings, reviewing 30+ agencies who were interested in our business and cutting it down to 6 agencies. One meeting turned into twenty meetings, since everyone in the company suddenly gets interested in advertising when you are hiring a new agency. Everyone wants a part and a say. April was spent meeting all 6 agencies for chemistry and credential checks and narrowing it down again to 3. All while doing my normal job! I was traveling to NYC all the time, overnight travel away from family. Brian and Peggy picking up Cian and taking over while I sat in hotel rooms with mommy guilt for this incredible opportunity.
We were in pitch from May - July. Each time I met with one agency to do a check in, I had to check in with the other two. All three were based in NYC, so it meant constant trips to NYC all spring and summer.
August we finally awarded the account to FCB. But now, we had been dark advertising since March and we needed a new campaign immediately to get back on air for fourth quarter. Turns out on-boarding an agency sometimes doesn't go that smoothly. 60 days into the relationship and we are bringing in mediators to help some relationship and staffing issues, while trying to create a Thanksgiving campaign in weeks. My fall was spent either defending my role, working with mediators or rushing through a campaign, while trying to get the larger bigger campaign off the ground. And, you know, still doing my normal job and make it home to my family.
Deciding to launch a new advertising campaign for a Fortune 250 company is easy - making it happen, not so much. Again, nonstop meetings to get everyone's approval, meeting with the agency to develop creative and dealing with a CMO, a woman who I admired greatly suddenly not in the office.
The holidays approach and we are late getting into production. Trying to fit in a photoshoot in between sinus surgery and Christmas. More time away. more stress. A tv shoot the week after New Year's in LA for 10 days. More time away. Trying to get creative ready, while trying to figure out how to get Cian taken care of while Brian can do his job. It takes a village, and I'm so thankful for my little village.Oh yeah, and throw launching internally to 10,000 employees on my plate.
February - the home stretch. Launch date is in sight. A light at the end of the tunnel. I know there will be weeks ahead where I don't have to travel. Where I can pick Cian up from school. Where I can make dinner again. Go on a date night. I can return calls and emails that aren't work related. Do something for me. Just one more month, a month of hell. So much work and not enough people. And now a company getting excited for the new campaign and the pressure is on. And then the worst of news- your CMO isn't home sick. She is dying. Immediately. I look back over the past year, the trips we took, the work we did together and all that time, she was fighting stage 4 breast cancer that spread throughout her body. While she is approving our rough cuts, she is doing so from her hospital bed and keeping it private. A conference call on a Wednesday so she can say good bye and thank you. Passed away on Saturday. And the weight of the company to launch her last campaign.
On March 7th, we finally launched our new campaign----
Teaser video we sent to employees to announce a new campaign was coming:
The behind the scene video that was sent to all employees
Our 60second commercial
It's been a year.
Add to that the never ending quest for a second child. A child we desperately want. A child we didn't get. What better time to go thru infertility treatments than last year when it was quiet and calm? Honestly, these doctor appointments have been part of my life since 2009, so it was just another step down the road. A year ago, we decided to try IVF as a our final effort. We emptied our savings, rang up huge, sickening, disgusting amount of debt and prayed, crossed our fingers and hoped. Well, I think we all know the story since its just the 3 of us. Failure three times. Nothing to show for all of our efforts expect for debt. That's a morale, self esteem killer. There is one more frozen embryo waiting for us. Maybe its our miracle. God, I hope so. But, either way its the ending of this horrible journey. I am sometimes amazed at what Brian and I have been thru and how we have overcome. But then other times, I feel so empty, lost and beaten up that I don't know if we overcame without a ton of sacrifice to us. But again, a light at the end of the tunnel. No more horrible side effects from all the hormones (cystic acne anyone? weight gain?) No more leaving vacations or missing out on events because you have a doctor appointment. No more taking shots to NYC in a freezer pack so you don't miss a dose. No more horrible two week waits to see a negative pregnancy test. No more stressing over money and your credit card bills (hey- you get to fly to punta cana for free when you have as many points as we do!) My journey with infertility will be ending shortly. The hole in my heart if we don't our second child, will never go away. I will always feel something is missing, there will always be a hole in my heart. Don't ever think I am not missing something, that I have healed, because I will always have this emptiness if I don't get our second child.
And I feel so bad for Cian, who desperately wants a sibling. I've let him down. He calls his stuffed animals "babies". He broke down crying a couple of weeks ago because he wants a baby brother or sister and how its not fair that everyone else has one. How do you help your child feel better when all you want to do is join him on the floor and cry yourself?
Yep, its been a year.
I am grateful that it was just a tough year with work and fertility and trying to stay afloat with birthdays and everyday life. It could have been far, far worse. I am grateful but it was a tough 12 months.
So, here I am today. Work is quiet and boring. Taking time off to recharge. Get a little order back to my life. To update a year's worth of blog postings in two sitting (yep, I am that kind of crazy. Gotta get it crossed off my to do list. Prior to this, I had only posted twice since last February!!!).
But the year is over. Here is to a hell of a great new year.
